happy? holidays

Well, here we are - just 24 days away from a Very Important Holiday: Christmas.

My kids are SO excited - they just can’t STAND it (even though we have yet to make our home look any different from how it did for Halloween). By the adorable excitement on their faces - you would think Christmas were in the next few days. While I’m EXTREMELY thankful that it’s not.

I’m FAR from prepared (did you read the part about not have decorated one little, tiny bit?).

And of course, we’re the only home on the block that is clearly darkened as if Scrooge lives here. Or the Grinch. Or anyone who says, “Ba Humbug” when it comes to this particular joyful time of year.

Honestly, I’m excited about Christmas also. Just to know that another special season with twinkle lights is basically here - gives me that warm glow feeling.

THE THING IS - making the time and finding the energy to actually decorate, shop for and wrap just the perfect gifts, mail Christmas cards (YES - we still do that!), attend fun & festive parties (ok - that part is actually pretty awesome!) can be a challenge.

Suddenly, I long for a “simple, quiet” Christmas.

LOTS to do. Christmas boxes to unpack. Kids to excite even more.

Sleepy just thinking about it. Maybe red nails will help wake me up and get me going!

What the ex-Cowboys coach taught me

In order to be a leader you have to know what’s happening on your team.

If your team is not following your game plan, then it’s up to you do what you can to ensure that they understand your strategy, objectives and the plays in order to guarantee a win.

If they refuse to be a part of your team, you should act first. (Oh, and low expectations isn’t going to win the team over. Set the bar high and expect great performances.)

Otherwise, just know that the ax will fail on you.

well well well

The last couple of weeks have been super busy - considering I’ve been concentrating on a better work/life balance. But just when the “leave the office at a decent hour” effort began - work got crazy. 

Can’t really say exactly what all sort of exploded on my desk, but suffice it to say - my balance was WAY off and the stress that this caused only made matters worse. This is when I learned that I don’t Have To Have everything in perfect balance. Sometimes work just takes over (depending on how important some major project is) and as long as you’re getting enjoyment out of some aspect of that work - and the home life is in good hands - then by golly Work It Out!

What’s also important is the light at the end of the tunnel. I knew that I was experiencing my job a little off kilter because while I usually work late, I don’t usually feel so overwhelmed. However, I knew that the early drives into the office and the super late exits were not “normal” and I could pinpoint when the major stress project would be complete. 

Once those weeks of insane hours were over, I immediately could recognize God in some significant details. I enjoyed my “regular” long hours so much more - with more energy and a better attitude. Ultimately, I remember just how much I LIKE what I do for a living and who I am blessed to work with each day. 

So - back to the grind? Yep - kinda happy about that! And now more time to write for Paperclip also! 

It’s win-win for me!

always a sucker for an accent

I’m super excited about this week. 

LOTS to do.

I’m starting off with a meeting today that is long, but interesting. The company will bring in folks from all over the world and I’ll get to hear first-hand what they’re doing to help the business succeed. I’m really looking forward to their presentations (and accents!).

Back at the office - I have a bazillion performance reviews to write. They’re due soon, but I want to ensure that the reviews are going to deliver good coaching and push people forward in their careers. 

Then tonight, I have a dinner with all of the people from the meeting earlier today. I’m looking forward to getting to know more people in the company.

I’ve had the outfit picked out since last Wednesday. I want to look uber polished and professional today. Nice gray, longer pencil skirt feels just perfect to me!

tightrope

You’re gonna laugh.

I’m leading a series of discussions about work/life balance in my Sunday School class. 

The real joke of that (which I’ve completely admitted to) is that this class is selfishly very much for me. My balance is (and has been for years) very skewed toward work.

I’m sure you’re shocked, all things considered. NOT.

Anyhoo, so yesterday we put our lives in a pie chart; trying to determine how our lives currently would map out. The homework is for us to take a look at the top five passions of our lives and see how well our actual time is being spent compared to the priorities that we say we value most.

The examples above were done VERY hastily (our class isn’t very long), but already I see some probable “latte factors” and some areas which should be essentials (but currently don’t get a lot of attention) in my schedule that need addressing. (Hey, I’ll admit that I’m FAR from perfect and generally very selfish.)

If you were to do the same, how do you think you would feel about how you’re spending the very valuable resource of time? 

Everyone says what a “gift” time is. Watching how quickly my kiddos are growing up . . . well, it’s pleasant and painful. The one thing I don’t want to have happen is for my time to be up and to feel as though I messed up by not devoting it to the areas that really needed it. Here’s to rethinking what’s important, what I’m passionate about - and how I’m spending my valuable resource of time.

It’s like walking a tightrope - balancing that passion for a meaningful career and also a meaningful and loving family life. Nope - it’s not the first time that I’ve gone through this exercise, but every time I do it - I find it extremely beneficial to stop and pay attention to what my time commitments are and whether I need to make some changes. 

The winds of change are blowing . . . . 

when it all starts to fall apart

Another vice that I have (one of many):

I watch TV. 

I’ve considered a MILLION times that I should really just shut it off and tune it out, but for some reason (since I was a kid) TV has been a part of my life.

Well - in a recent episode of Project Runway - one of the designers has a difficult time finishing the assignment because the vision of what she wanted to create wasn’t coming together and she felt like she was going to have to compromise the integrity of her work by continuing on. (Ok - this plot actually happens on just about EVERY episode of Project Runway. Again, I DO wonder why I even bother watching.)

Anyway . . . (sigh) in her case, she tells the camera (us): “So I have to start over; get my head in the game; stop talking, and focus.” In the end, she prevails.

Then in a different episode: Michael Kors (one of the judges on the show, for those who don’t watch it), says of a different designer’s work: “ Everyone in life, regardless of what you do, you’re going to have difficult moments. And I think he (speaking of a specific  designer) showed us today, he’s gonna work with the difficulties in his life and not let them stop him. If anything, they’re going to propel him!”

Basically, it’s always very inspiring to see someone who is on the brink of giving up or breaking down not only finish, but actually succeed! It feels almost like a choice that they make. When things get tough, pull it together and push through with thoughtfulness.

I guess that’s why I Tivo this particular show every week. (Gossip Girl, however, I have NO excuses.)

balancing art

I LOVE my job (why do I always list this first???).

I LOVE my family.

I LOVE my God and church.

I am blessed and I KNOW it.

Okay - but, I’m one of those types of people that has a hard time with balancing these joys. I work late. I have a bazillion errands on the weekends. I am trying to not freak out over how much there is to do and how little time there always seems to be. It’s a struggle to be cool and not get caught up in some drama or chaos.

I’m also trying to teach my kiddos my values - and sometimes I know that they appear very out of wack.

Needless to say - I’m excited about a new book that I recently purchased. 

One Year of Inspiration for Girlfriends . . . Juggling Not-So-Perfect, Often-Crazy, but Gloriously Real Lives

Yep - that’s the title (which is really long) and the author is Ellen Miller.

I happen to know this author - she’s a former boss and I really like her. Ellen is very smart and witty. She’s been crazy busy and understands living through a stressful, nutty life. She’s been an executive within the corporate world and now she owns her own marketing agency all while being a wife, mom and very active church member. She’s always a million percent in when she’s committed to something. She has a very close group of friends that are her support system - and her husband is amazingly supportive of her as well. When I first met her in the office (on the first day of her job), I told her “I’m going to be a sponge around you - just so I can learn EVERYTHING from you.” 

(Yes, looking back - I realize how silly that sounds, but if you met her - you maybe would have said something just as silly. No, Really.)

She’s super stylish - always looks AMAZING and exudes confidence. She was the first person in my career who actually cared about the art in her office! Highly organized and very pulled together. And she has a very optimistic personality (i.e. high energy and very happy). She beams. If this lady had “bad days” (even a “bad hair day”), no one EVER knew it. Not that she’s perfect, because she’s not. BUT, she’s REALLY close.

I’ve gotten Ellen’s “Truth Nuggets” via email for years - and this is taking them to the next level. She’s organized them into different segments, with daily reading entries (like a daily devotional) and includes a work sheet at the end of each. I’m hoping that I’ll gleam ANY advice, strategy that will help me create more balance between all of the different facets of my life. I’ve told my husband a million times that I just need to do a better job of work/life balance. Uh huh.

So, it’s time for me to put up or shut up on this topic. Wish me luck!

falling for . . . far

There’s a chill in the air - finally! I actually wore a fall jacket today! The weather was gorgeous and crisp. Today’s outfit was a celebration of professional warmth:

• gray wool, pencil skirt (new!)
• gray tights (that’s right - you heard me!)
• burgundy mary jane heels (looking forward to high heel loafers, though)
• crisp white shirt (tucked in and rolled up skinny sleeves)
• gray, tweed jacket (only worn into the office - didn’t wear it during the day)
• and the ultimate accessory: chunky bracelet (with tons of gray beads)

I was in a great mood ALL day long. Maybe it was the new skirt, maybe breaking into some fall attire - who knows? 

It’s fall, baby! (And now for some sinus medicine!)

monday with a happy

Today Rob comes back in town from a week of vacation. During that week he celebrated his 1st wedding anniversary and also his birthday. He’s returning to a very busy week, of course, so - Jaime suggested that we make sure to not have the usual cup cake fair to welcome him back with. Husband Todd to the rescue with a yummy, homemade strawberry cake. Hopefully, this will be just the right touch of “welcome back,” “happy birthday,” & “happy anniversary” all in one. 

(Smells really good. Both of the kiddos want some.)

stylin' (literally!)

Today I’m meeting a garment stylist that I’ve never worked with before to help me set up for Tuesday’s photo shoot. I’m excited because this is the Land Of Opportunity. Lots to get done, but BEYOND excited about it!

She’s got her work cut out for her, though - all kinds of seasons to cover, all types of clothing (and accessories). I think she’ll be very prepared and talented, based on the amount of experience she brings to the assignment. (TONS!)

Needless to say - this Monday is going to be GOOD!!!

getting some ZZZZs

I don’t know about you, but the past couple of weeks have been Extremely Busy. The first week of September involved a super heavy workload - that kept me working day and night. The second week included house guests and evenings out Every Single Night of the week - only to be concluded with a weekend getaway. 

Basically, I’ve been operating on very little rest and it’s my goal to get back into my usual (healthier) routine. I know that I feel better, have better stress tolerance, and really believe that I process things faster and make better decisions.

This is the week that things will get back to normal. That doesn’t mean slow (by any means), but at least - it will be more typical and I can really ensure that I can get my usual ZZZZs. 

Besides, I NEED all the beauty rest I can get.

snack happy

So - sometimes I want something sweet in the afternoons (like dessert after lunches).  When I do - I either grab an apple or pear (watch out for the juice!) . . . 

OR . . . . 

gum. I chew the green flavor, but I don’t just chew one piece - no. if I enjoy one piece of gum - I will have just had four within the hour.

(Still beats candy or cookies for the good ol’ afternoon pick me up!) 

And yes, that is an extra Luna Bar, but that is for the emergency I-didn’t-bring-my-lunch-and-now-it’s-too-late-to-go-pick-some-up moment.

What’s in your snack drawer?

green AND cute

I drink water throughout my work day. I WANT to be green. I’ve tried a MILLION different reusable water bottles. They never really seemed appropriate for work due to their large sizes or their wide mouths (or if they would sweat on the conference room tables - ugh!). The colors of the bottles (my fault, since I purchased them) would always attract too much attention to them. They just didn’t fit in to regular, normal office protocol. 

Until I found this super cute CUP (which includes a handy straw!!).

I bought two - one for home and one for the office. It’s a good size, about the same as my Starbucks drink cup. It’s not super huge or really small. It’s just right. And simple. Perfect for the office. Doesn’t sweat. BPA free, too.

You can get it at:

BeGoodToPeople.com

$11

i'm not a prude, but a mom? yes.

So I took my eleven year-old shopping for some new clothes with my mom. After going to a couple of stores, we went to the place where we generally have more success (for school clothes): Abercrombie (not to be confused with Abercrombie & Fitch - the store for teenagers). This is the store that is marketed to KIDS.

We walked around. Found some very cute shirts, shorts, tee-shirts, etc. My daughter didn’t want anything from there today (odd!), but on our way out of the store - I noticed something: The mannequins were ALL intentionally styled to have the shirts unbuttoned very LOW. 

I asked the young teenager salesperson if I could talk to a manager (as I had questions about this). I was nice. So was the manager. I asked how old the target customer of this store is - “the upper range ends at 14.”

I asked why all of the mannequins how their shirts unbuttoned so low. 

“Corporate dictates this to us.”

We started shopping in this store when my daughter was 9 (maybe late 8’s). I just think that the store could be a TAD more tasteful and represent it’s clothing to CHILDREN in a more appropriate manner. 

I’m not a prude - seriously, but even my daughter thought that the store should be more appropriate (and that wasn’t because I told her this). My mom had her out of the store before I really went around taking pictures of their mannequins. 

I’m sure there is worse in the world and that I’m trying Very Hard to shelter her from tons of exposure to sexually explicit, overt impressions. I think it’s my responsibility to keep an eleven year old as young as I can for as long as I can. She’s got enough peer pressure in her new middle school to grow up. 

We discussed today that I’m going to shop for her online and return stuff she Doesn’t Like (which hopefully, won’t be Everything Mom Likes). Once the new clothes arrive at home, she’ll be able to see them mixed in with her current wardrobe. Overall, I’m hoping that removing the pressure of shopping in a store (with all of those impulse pressures) will be healthier for our over-protective, sheltering mother/preteen-growing-up-too-fast daughter relationship. Don’t EVEN get me 

started on the fact that the mannequins even have developed breasts!! No pressure.

Every One Is This Unbuttoned.

That’s a directive from some corporate marketing person - who’s kid either hasn’t gotten to the tender age of ten or eleven yet and so they don’t realize how impressionable they are, 

OR

They don’t have kids yet - and DON’T CARE about the message that this is sending,

OR

They have kids that are already all grown up and so, they don’t remember how YOUNG the age of 

ten and eleven really is.

They have the buttons. Soooo . . . someone there realizes that they NEED the buttons. Where is the disconnect between these two departments? The clothing designer gave these clothes buttons. Is that designer upset that the store merchandising stylist doesn’t take into consideration that buttons on clothing for the younger demographic are intended to be used?

I’m purposefully NOT continuing down the path of questioning the fit of the clothing used on the

mannequins, but really - I am pretty curious about why Super Tight in preteen wear is more stylish. 

I guess only the folks at Corporate know these answers for sure.

Abercrombie - if you’re going to have a store for KIDS, then please let them be KIDS and button 

up your shirts!!!

it takes a village

The people who have helped me raise my kiddos which has allowed me to focus on my job have been a very valuable investment. 

Danielle - neighborhood kid who has grown into an incredibly smart college student (practically a big sister to my kiddos):

• the original kid “tutor” (afternoon homework helper and driver to various sport practices)
• the original summertime “too young to be their mom” babysitter - who ensured my kids got to sleep in, or go to a nearly waterpark, or host playdates, or bake cookies, or have smoothies, or put the kids through bootcamp-style conditioning workouts (since that IS her major in school), or go to movies . . . the list here could go on for a mile . . .
• the person who was NEVER mean if I ran late (up to a half-hour!) coming home from work in the evenings
• the person who would empty the dishwasher or sometimes even fold laundry - even though that was so NOT in her job duties (but was a very appreciated HELP)
• the person we had come to rely on as a family to keep the kids schedules in order and their routines and behavior expectations clearly defined
• our friend.

Sandi - Danielle’s mom, our neighbor (until she moved recently):

• the person who taught Danielle how to truly care for our kids (since Danielle did the gig before Sandi)
• the person who the kiddos became EXTREMELY attached to and never wanted her to leave, EVER.
• the. most. understanding. kind. person. (with tons of patience and a huge HEART).
• the person who took care of our house and our kids as if they were her own
• the person who energized the kiddos about their homework - really taught them to embrace projects and make the most out of them (try their hardest to make the “A”)
• the person who we quickly fell IN LOVE with and were very excited about what our kids would do with her (the summer craft projects alone would Blow Me Away when I would come home from a long day’s work)!
• the person that understood our kids, where we were in life and already knew what we had to look forward to as our kiddos grow older
• the person who would accompany us to Kenny’s Burger Joint when I didn’t want to cook (and also became a fellow regular there!)
• the special person who went on our first Girls Night Out (just Brooke, Sandi & myself) to see “Letters to Juliet” - and then late dinner at Kenny’s Burger Joint
• the person who taught us all how to travel through a difficult life change with dignity and to respect yourself enough to realize when it’s time for that change
• the person who sadly moved away to rebuild her life elsewhere (but who keeps in touch!)

AND NOW . . . 

Leigh - BRAND NEW and already making a BIG impression!!!

It’s only been two days since she’s started watching our kiddos in the afternoon and she has already made some pretty major accomplishments:

• Monday night dinner: Turkey and Rice*
• Tuesday night dinner: Tilapia and Broccoli with cheese sauce*
• Major help with the composition notebook decoration project
• Major kiddo happiness because they are a part of a HUGE gaggle of kids (not really that big, but when you’re only used to being around two . . . more seems like a lot to them) and it’s just one Big, Happy Family
• Major Parent Happiness - because like Danielle and Sandi, we know Leigh and her family really well. We feel that she’s perfect to help us transition from someone as loving as Sandi and Danielle to someone that the kids know also very well (and respect, mind, EAT HER FOOD). My son gets to HANG with one of his best buddies every afternoon - which he is SUPER HAPPY about and my daughter enjoys being a “helper” to Miss Leigh and her three year old. She’s learning babysitter skills thanks to this arrangement . . . 
• Another bonus is that Miss Leigh is a fellow Football Mom (our sons play on the same football team) and this means that my son will see that I’m not the only crazy lady on the sidelines who “can’t wait to see you make that tackle!”
• Bottom line is: we trust her. We LOVE the fact that everything else is working out so well, here (I’m in AWE of her skills in training my kids to eat REAL food!!!), but we simply needed someone we could trust to have the best interest of our kids at heart (like Danielle and Sandi did). 

If you work corporate hours (LONG hours) and you have school-age kids, then you really need that support system to know that everyone is getting what they need done and getting to wherever they are supposed to be on time. This support system allows you to be able to work with less worry which equates to better on-the-job focus. This is an investment, but I believe that it is completely essential.

Having grandparents nearby is also SUPER helpful (or those sick days that pop up out of nowhere (always on days that you have a meeting that you Just Can’t Miss) or when you have late evening meetings on the exact same nights that the hubby is also out of town. Gotta love the flexibility of their retirement!!!

Speaking of the hubby, if you have the type of job that keeps you chained to an office for really long hours, it works out pretty darn nice for your partner to have a really flexible gig. That way when the school does something not bright - like schedule new school orientation on a Thursday morning (8:30 until noon!!!), then he can cover it. (I’m not bitter - I just don’t understand how that was only a scheduling issue for ME.)

Yes - it takes a village (a LOT of help, actually!!) to get us through our hectic daily list of activities, homework, projects and dinner. It also takes special people like Danielle, Sandi and Leigh - who spend their time helping us raise our kiddos and mold them into good, respectful, well-mannered future teens. (“Teens” = “yikes!”)

*BTW, the fact that Leigh is feeding our kiddos dinner was an off-shoot from the fact that her family eats dinner WAY earlier than we EVER have (like in the FIVE O’CLOCK hour). We were THRILLED when she offered to feed our kiddos to (since she has the kiddos until much later in the evenings), but Never - EVER expected our super picky eater son to actually learn to eat MEAT (and FISH!!!!) so quickly from her dinner table. I guess the fact that his best buddy was sitting next to him gobbling up Miss Leigh’s food put a little more pressure on him to act a little older (less baby-ish) and just eat the food helped. BUT this kid (who for the majority of his LIFE has maintained that he is a “veterinarian” - which he has always used to mean “vegetarian”), sat me down after the first day at Miss Leigh’s house and told me point blank that I had never noticed that he was a MEAT EATER - and that I had just missed this fact about him (his ENTIRE LIFE!!??!!), was impressive. He’s brainwashed that he’ll love everything she feeds him. WOW.